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Philip O'Reilly

@orphmi

I write humorous - at least to me - articles here: https://teapaw.org/t.co/IVsnFWB1tt If you feel I've earned a tip:

 Vancouver, British Columbia
buymeacoffee.com/schrodingerschicken
Joined January 2012
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiOct 28
I swear my wife believes that if she asks me to do something while I'm distracted, it will incept into my mind. That, or live sports makes the television completely invisible to her.
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiOct 18
I want to go to a hockey game, not the county fair.
Mr Lucky (@Terence75852488) profile pictureMr Lucky@Terence75852488Oct 18
Replying to @orphmi @TheHockeyNews @Ken_Campbell27
I feel the same. Just don’t enjoy the in house game experience anymore. Non stop music, contests, PA announcer. Etc
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiOct 16
Replace the dinosaurs running the league and try new streaming approaches that let fans buy individual games rather than subscribing to services that don't carry the games they want to watch.
Mango 🏒🏈🥭 (@goalofmain) profile pictureMango 🏒🏈🥭@goalofmainOct 16
“Attendance issues in the NHL” Simply quit pricing out the families and lower the costs of food and drink. The attendance will come back.
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiOct 7
Replying to @worldhockeyrpt
They don’t care. Now if they were blocking out Americans…
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiOct 7
Replying to @yyzsportsmedia
I’d prefer to defund the CBC and let those who want to watch it pay for it.
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiOct 5
Replying to @DLee075
It would be relatively easy for the NHL to setup a service that lets fans subscribe to their teams rather than a general broadcast streaming service. Dinosaurs.
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiOct 4
Is there a good way to watch Sens games while living in Vancouver? Aside from pirating them?
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiSep 15
We have recipes for a reason. Link to the article is in the replies... ⏬
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Brilliant Maps
@BrilliantMapsSep 14
The Most Mentioned Country On Every Other Country’s Wikipedia Page Find out which countries has more mentions than the US: brilliantmaps.com/most-used-…
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The Abiding Dude@ParaDude99Aug 15
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiAug 3
Brain quit the heist. So, the job went to the only volunteer left: Ass. New comedy episode is up. Nobody involved has a plan that makes sense and everyone is fine with that. 👇
🤖 Made with AI
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Places of Earth
@PlacesOfEarthXJul 26
Replying to @theepicmap
Red Hair Distribution in Europe
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJul 22
Did you know that Benjamin Franklin did not invent DST, but is responsible for the society transforming “Long Arm?" He is also rumored to have stolen lightning from Zeus. (Imaginary Editor): Nope Link👇
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJul 21
My latest. Link 👇
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJun 17
... rage farming ought to change my fortunes, so he took a great breath and sang out, “Wolf! Wolf! A wolf is going to eat the sheep!” The villagers came running up the hill to help the boy drive the wolf away. But when they arrived at the top of the... schrodingerschicken.substack…
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJun 17
There once was a shepherd boy who was bored as he sat on the hillside obsessing about his poor Instagram metrics... oh, ya, and watching the village sheep. This gig sucks, he thought, I shouldn’t be shepherding, I should be aura farming! A little...🔽
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJun 17
That's because losers look stuff up while the rest of us are carp'en all them 'diems. -- Summer Smith
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJun 17
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJun 18
Reply with the most shameless thing you've seen a coworker do for free office food. I'll go first: someone in my office works out of the break room with a 'have you tried rebooting' sign on his laptop so he can guard the leftovers.
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Philip O'Reilly
@orphmiJun 18
Full article: schrodingerschicken.substack… Read the full satirical takedown here.
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