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My kid asked me what my childhood was like so I took the batteries out of the remote and had him change channels by hand the rest of the night.
Not You Again. retweeted
the concept of having to study (which i hate) to get a job (which i hate even more) to live (which i hate the most)
Not You Again. retweeted
I was relatively fucking productive this weekend and and wrapped it up playing a pretty fucking good hockey game
Not You Again. retweeted
When you go from hour long conversations to no conversations for days & months..... that 💔
Not You Again. retweeted
Missed the 2 AM existential crisis train, so here I am catching the 3 AM local.
Not You Again. retweeted
One of the metal detectors at the metro had a sign that read 'Men without baggage'.
Tough to find one in today's times.
Not You Again. retweeted
Neighbor: my dog woke me up at 2am to go outside and then she didn’t even pee
Me: I guess we know who wears the hairy legs in your family
Not You Again. retweeted
People who don't understand angel numbers are so annoying. I'm sorry if you can't be inspired and guided by a car's license plate. I can.
Not You Again. retweeted
If it's not one of the planets in retrograde, it's the full moon. You can blame anything for your craziness.
Not You Again. retweeted
If a woman ever says * I just find it funny that*
There's is a 99% chance she didn't find it funny










